March 27, 2014

Of Love And A Couch

Salam and hi all.

I was lying on the bed effortlessly when I thought of watching a movie. But I'd like to watch the not-now-showing movie in the cinemas. So I browse through my HDD, and what caught my eyes was 'Sex and the City'. Oh dear, don't give me that look. Well, I've watched it before and my opinion was it was an OK movie, not that impressive. But I don't know what on earth had pushed me to watch it again this time.

---------watching movie--------

Throughout the movie, I found myself clicked the pause button so many times--to reread the subtitles--because I was so attracted, or I would say, affected by the script. And so I thought, "why did I not feel this way when I watched this before? This movie has a lot to teach us."  I must be a grownup now, yeah I think so.

"I was running like crazy, trying to make that one man I loved to love me back. Now he does love me, and he just wants to sit on a couch in New York city with me. I really hope my past hasn't screwed up my future. And what's so bad about a couch anyway?" This was the line taken from the scene when Bradshaw realised that all this time, she demands so much from her husband, that she forgot how bad she wants him to be in her life. She dragged him to a crowded film premiere when all he wants after getting back from work is to sit on the couch with her.

OK, I must say this is so....I can't find the word. Maybe you can fill in the blanks for me. How we, human being, are not satisfied with what we're having now, is a serious thing to be fixed. When we want something so badly, we ended up like a crazy person putting in endless effort so that we can have it, just like we've always wanted. And now that we have it, we want something else! We demand for more. Shouldn't we feel grateful that we've earned it?

Life's too long when you don't have someone beside you to spend it with. Cherish your beloved husband, family, and friends.

Till then.

March 10, 2014

A million worth ten minutes

Salam and hi all.

I'm back in Jakarta. Sob sob. Taknak terima kenyataan yang holiday's over. Tak dan panas bontot balik Malaysia, dah kena balik Jakarta semula.

So why am I back here? Untuk repeat OSCE. What is OSCE? Some sort of clinical exam where we, med students have to diagnose a number of patients in front of the examiners. Truth be told, it is only a matter of luck. Why? Cause people have different perception, different desire, and so as our examiners. If you strive hard for the exam only to be examined by the 'killer' specialists (whom we never knew how to please), you might not pass. And if you only did it half-heartedly, but the examiners were so-so lah kan, you might pass all the stations. Huh. Very unfair. But this only happens in my university, I guess?

OK, I am not writing this because I want to merungut (sebab dah puas merungut before this), I just want to express my sadness upon paying for the exam. So it's like this, in my university if you fail a paper, or a clinical exam, you will be given a chance to repeat the paper or the clinical exam. The difference between those two is, you must pay for repeating a clinical exam. Repeating a paper won't cost you anything. So in my case, I fail a station in OSCE, where I need to repeat it, and for that reason I have to pay lah! Haa, here's the interesting story. It costs me a million rupiah (about RM 300) to repeat that exam. And the exam only lasts for ten minutes. No extra classes or anything, just to sit for a 10 minutes exam, do I have to pay that much?

Plus, I felt so wronged because the examiner being "kedekut markah". My friends and I have done our best, finished all the physical exam, giving the right diagnosis and treatment, and educate the patient as well. What more do you expect us to do? How can others succeeded when they did the same thing as us? Sigh. Enough lah, konon tadi taknak merungut but here I go again. Now my 1 million rupiah have gone away. Bubbye money.

P/S: Pray for MH370.